Back crack quack attack – the song

Not got round to doing any extended chiropractic debunking as yet, though I am enjoying tremendously seeing what the rest of the posse have been up to. Anyway, as a small contribution, I thought that perhaps the counter-Chiropractic unreality movement needed a theme song. So here is my attempt.

For the tune I have chosen a late 60s classic of pained disaffection with the state of the world. It seemed appropriate somehow. For full versions of the song see below.


Back Crack quack attack

Back crack quack attack

Lawyers’ fangs rip honest hack

Reality’s all out of whack

Nineteenth century Chiro sCAM


Writs gag – rich man’s law

Chiropractors scream for more

Free discussion shown the door

Nineteenth century Chiro sCAM


Back crack quack attack

Libel lawyers’ lips will smack

But beware! The nerds fight back

Nineteenth century Chiro-sCAM


The little video above, which is actually just the last part of the song, comes from an early performance of the song 21st Century Schizoid Man when King Crimson supported the Rolling Stones at a famous free festival in Hyde Park in 1969. This was the festival a few days after ex-Stones guitarist Brian Jones’ death, and the performance at which Mick Jagger famously read Keats to the assembled fans in memory of Jones – a clip which turns up on many a TV documentary and indeed on Youtube.

And before you ask, of course I wasn’t there. I’m old, but I’m not that old.

The full audio of 21st Century Schizoid Man from the same performance (no visuals) is here, with the album version here. Finally, there is another version, apparently from a BBC session, here.


PS In an earlier version I did have a slightly different verse:

Laws to keep the truth unsaid
Legal maze and robes of red
Keep the rich and powerful fed
Nineteenth Chiro sCAM

– which might have been better, but sadly it seems that English High Court Judges sitting on defamation cases no longer wear the old red robes.


12 Responses to “Back crack quack attack – the song”

  1. Warhelmet Says:

    Awesome! But you need to get someone to perform it and post it on Youtube.

  2. Dr Aust Says:

    Yes, it needs a performance. I would be delighted if some sceptical music-lover out there were to accept the job…

  3. Svetlana Says:

    Edzard Ernst has come out at last with post in support of Simon Singh! He wrote his post in “Times”:


  4. Neuroskeptic Says:

    Great! Except, you have to work the word “bogus” into it somehow… chiropractic cannot be allowed to be mentioned without that word from now. It’s the law, apparantly.

  5. John H Says:

    Very good.

    Robert Fripp would be turning in his grave (if only he was dead).

  6. Svetlana Says:
    Did you see it?

    However it is enough funny that such contradictory person as Nick Cohen expresses progressive opinion now. I started to doubt…. There is a danger of loss, as I suspect. Be prepared to further battles. It is possible, “left wing” (i.e. Goldacre, Colquhoun, you, etc) will be forced to battle without support against chiros.

  7. draust Says:

    The Guardian and Observer are the broadly centre-left progressive newspapers (daily and Sunday respectively) in the UK, and belong to the same stable.

    Nick Cohen was historically broadly liberal in his views, which is probably why he is still writing for the Observer, though a lot of people would say he has moved significantly to the right as he has got older. However, I think it is most accurate to see him these days as a kind of “libertarian contrarian”. Actually “contradictory” is not a bad word for him.

    I certainly don’t agree with Nick Cohen’s view about everything, but on libel laws and free discussion he is bang on. And a dislike of bullshit, and of overbearing use of power, cuts across the political spectrum – thankfully.

    The same “cuts across party” is true of Alt.Reality thinking as well. You can find enthusiasts for CAM right across the political spectrum in the UK, and the US too.

  8. Svetlana Says:

    Yes? Thus my fears are baseless…
    I am glad if it is so. Certainly, coalitions of different progressive forces is good thing.

    Good luck and victory to all of us!

  9. Simon Singh Case Response Roundup « God knows what… Says:

    […] the outcome and promises a more detailed post soon. [NOW ADDED TO ARTICLES] He also suggests a potential theme song that would be a suitable companion for this whole […]

  10. Svetlana Says:

    Doctor!! Wake up!
    He has decided to appeal!!!
    David and Andy have written about it else before morning dawn :)

    And I have written a bit later ;)

  11. Beware the spinal trap – with added amateur legal musing (updated twice) « Dr Aust’s Spleen Says:

    […] Back Crack Quack Attack – the song – sadly as yet unrecorded, though it did gain me the scorn of a rather serious person styling themself “Cochrane Reviewer” over at Science Punk. […]

  12. Stop Press: Simon Singh wins Appeal Court ruling on meaning « Dr Aust’s Spleen Says:

    […] Back Crack Quack Attack – the song – sadly as yet unrecorded, though it did gain me the scorn of a rather serious person styling themself “Cochrane Reviewer” over at Science Punk. […]

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